Rebirthing
by D.N.C
Summary: Tayuya is on the long, dusty road back from hell. The manmade purgatory will will make her clean, if it does not first take her sanity.
1. Broken

_Pain is the one thing everyone fears…_

_When you hurt, it in a sense changes who you are; pain, whether it's physical, mental, or emotional, subtly affects the inner person. Pain is always a catalyst…it…sometimes to purification, sometimes it has a worsening effect…All major religions have an explanation of why pain exists…often finding expression in the concept of purgatory, which cleanses a person of his sins through a process of intense suffering…_

_No one wishes for pain. But it is the fire that kills and- sometimes- restores at the same time. _

It was blinding; she didn't have time to scream. She had been only knocked unconscious one other time in her life, during a sparring match with Sakon (what had that bastard done to her, anyway?). Same thing, really…a blinding, intense stab of pain and then the darkness.

Of course, Sakon-whatever the hell he had done- had nothing on a thousand-pound tree. She knew that she was dead when the branches started crashing all around her. Oddly, she didn't curse or scream. She just smiled.

Her whole f---ing life sucked. Why shouldn't end like this? Killed by a big f---ing weasel…

"Who the f--- uses weasels anyway?" was her last conscious thought.

----

The two medics had caught up with Nara Shikamaru. Fearing the worst, they were both somewhat surprised to find the chuunin in good health and talking with a rather attractive Sand-nin.

They were also somewhat surprised that Shikamaru appeared annoyed at his good fortune. Truth was, he was tired of being lectured by the kunoichi, who was currently lecturing him in a condescending tone about the value of aggressiveness.

"See, you would have pulled back in a situation in which we clearly…" blah blah blah. He sighed. How troublesome. Had she actually killed so many people that she could give a freakin' tactical briefing right after…

He noticed the medics about at that point. "Yo."

Temari, a bit miffed at being interrupted, fell silent. The taller medic nodded politely and then turned to the Konoha chuunin. "I assume both of you are in good condition, Shikamaru-san?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "Got a couple of my fingers broken, got my pride crushed, and now I'm being preached at by this troublesome…woman, but otherwise, I'm doing alright."

Temari smirked. "Woulda thought you'd be more grateful after I saved your ass. Well, can't expect much from you…"

The leading medic coughed. "I'm quite pleased to see that you…" Shikamaru interrupted with a tone of uncharacteristic urgency.

"Chouji! God, how could I….do you know how he's doing?"

The medic shook his head. "We were assigned to find you. Honestly, I have no idea what happened to Chouji-san or the rest of the team."

Shikamaru cursed softly. "Then go….please go figure out where he is. We're fine; don't waste anymore time here." The two medic-nins nodded. The leader leaned over to talk to his assistant.

"Let's check Sector Seven; last report I received stated that Chouji-san was in that area…"

They all paused when Temari called out. None of the three Leaf-nins had noticed her leaving. She had a habit of making sure her opponent was dead after a battle; one of her best friends had been killed in a fight with the Rock Village because she didn't take such a precaution. A ninja that appears dead is not always dead. Temari had learned that lesson well.

"The hell! She's still breathing a bit. I can't…well," she paused briefly, before shaking her head the slightest bit. The Sound-nin's legs were crushed, but apparently the tree limb had missed her vital spots. "Guess I might as well put her out of her misery."

Temari drew a kunai. She took no pleasure in what she was about to do. It was merely part of the job.

-----

Shikamaru opened his mouth about halfway. This wasn't something he wanted. 'Course, he had spent the entire day doing things he didn't want to. More like most of his life…

And then the stress hit him like a massive wave. Chouji very well could be dead. So could Neji and Kiba. He had no idea where Naruto was, or if Sasuke-teme was even still in Fire Country. And this was on his watch. He was responsible for every one of these men.

He felt a numbing pain spread through his head. It wasn't a physical pain like the migraines he suffered from sometimes; it was a disturbing sense of helplessness that seemed to shut down his brain.

"Dammit…" he muttered, leaning against a tree.

For a minute, he was just sick of it. He had never thought it would be this way (he guessed it was his own fault); just the horror of the thing. His best friend-God, he had better not have taken that pill! Kiba was probably dead. Neji was probably dead. Naruto? Only God knew now.

Life was such a troublesome thing, and everyone fights so hard to hang on to it. Yet everyone on the team was so desperate to bring a comrade back; and every freakin' one of the Sound Four had fought like hell…for no reason.

Pointlessness. He had spent many nights just fearing it. And now a sickening sense of meaninglessness (he had felt it before, but not like this) flooded over him. For all he knew, he had just killed his entire team for no freakin' reason. And this girl was breathing her last for even less of a reason.

There was no relenting from the war against emptiness. But maybe there could be one less casualty.

Temari was steeling herself (she had only killed two other people in her life, and never like this). She glanced over Shikamaru, who appeared to be in intense pain. "What's wrong with you?"

"Don't kill her. Don't. I can't f---ing take anymore of this!"

Temari wasn't shocked. A lot of shinobi broke down a bit after their first real combat mission. Besides, Shikamaru here was a Leaf-nin, and everyone knew they were too soft anyway (although a nagging thought at the back of her brain questioned this commonly-held belief). What the hell was Konoha thinking, sending a freshly-minted chuunin on this kind of mission?

"Get a hold of yourself. I'm being merciful, you stupid ass. She won't suffer at all, this way."

She sighed and noticed one of the medic-nins. He was standing right over the redhead's body. "What do _you_…"

"I apologize, ma'am, but we are under orders to bring back any captured enemies alive, as long as it does not interfere with our other duties. It is the order of Hokage-sama."

"What the…"

"For interrogation purposes, ma'am. It is quite possible that Konoha and Otokagure will be engaged in a lengthy war. We need all the information we can possibly obtain about the Sound Village and Orochimaru."

This bit of information caused mixed emotions in Shikamaru, who by this time had managed to calm himself. He was glad (why?) that the girl wasn't going to be killed right off, but what about Chouji? His best friend, after all, was a bit more important to him than his erstwhile enemy, never mind this damn mental condition he was in. He opened his mouth, but the medic-nin was one step ahead of him.

"My assistant has already begun to search for Chouji-san. Please do not worry, Shikamaru-san, the Konoha medical corps…"

"What about her?" Shikamaru interrupted, making a gesture towards the unconscious Sound-nin. "Is she going to live?"

Temari sighed as she re-sheathed her kunai. If Konoha's interrogation corps was anything like Suna's, she wished for the Sound-nin's sake that she wouldn't.

She looked down one last time at her enemy, who was having a difficult time breathing.

"_Deus vobiscum." _She then stood up and left.

-----

Nara Shikamaru was beginning to feel rather foolish that he had cared so much for his enemy. Not very shinobi-like, he decided. Shikamaru had departed around the same time as Temari, attempting to regain contact with the members of his team and hopefully to find out what the hell had happened to the mission. Hardly knowing where to go, he got directions to "Sector Seven" from the medic. Might as well start there…

Special Jounin Hayate Kaito was one of the premier medic-nins of Konoha. He was not pleased. Although he technically told the truth to Shikamaru, he had not relayed the urgency that Hogake-sama had placed on taking prisoners alive. Kaito muttered under his breath; he would much rather be healing his comrades than his enemies.

Nonetheless, orders were orders. He carefully performed the standard branch-removal technique; he severed the branch from the rest of the tree, and using chakra-enhanced strength, gently lifted the heavy piece of wood off of the girl's legs.

He then looked her over closely for the first time. He nearly winced; if the girl survived, it was quite possible that she'd never walk again. She also appeared to have taken a nasty hit to the head; after running a quick chakra diagnostic on her, Kaito also discovered a fair amount of internal bleeding. She was expiring fast, but the medic had saved people in worse conditions.

His medical instincts kicking in, he quickly lost all personal disdain for healing the girl and began to work intently. Inserting chakra into the girl, he stopped the bleeding within a few minutes. After doing a lung-rebuilding technique, her breathing became regular. Kaito wiped the sweat from his forehead and cracked a smile. The bugger was probably going to pull through.

He glanced at his watch. The recovery squad should have been here by now. Although he had stabilized the Sound-nin's condition, she was still a long way from being healthy…or at least healthy enough to be interrogated.

He frowned, and almost felt pity for the girl.


	2. In Transit

**Rebirthing: Update II **

Author's Notes:

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of 'Rebirthing.' I'm sorry that the pace is a little slow right now; I think it will pick up quite a bit once Tayuya reaches Konoha.

As you may have surmised by the chapter title, this is a chapter briefly describing the trip there. I'll also begin to flesh out the more secretive side of Tayuya.

I greatly appreciate any sort of review.

Peace out.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

…_once described the purpose of pain in the form of a parable. He described a man who fought with lust, and was finally redeemed thru a process that entailed the worst pain he had ever suffered._

_In a different work, he mused that: _

"… _the longest way 'round is the shortest way home." _

The Battlefield Identification and Recovery Group was generally comprised of unlucky genins and lower-level chuunins who would usually rather be some place else. The BIRG's purpose was to retrieve corpses or severally injured personnel from a combat zone. Occasionally, the Group was also tasked with "recovering" prisoners of war, as was the case for BIRG Squad Five.

Actually, a BIRG squad being sent on this kind of assignment at all was testament to the fact that Konoha was severely short on manpower. Normally, ANBU operatives would be assigned to a prisoner-collecting mission; however, ANBU had taken severe casualties in the recent Sand/Sound invasion.

This was a source of almost endless frustration for the new Hokage. The precious few ANBU operatives now available were spread to the breaking point, primarily keeping order in Konoha (the crime rate had risen considerably thanks to the general turmoil, and ANBU had to take the place of military police) or else engaging in top-secret missions in Otogakure or (unofficially) Sunagakure.

Which left BIRG Squad Five, comprising two genins and one administrative chuunin, to "collect" the unconscious Sound-nin. Special Jounin Hayate Kaito had radioed Squad Five shortly after beginning work on the girl. The morons had apparently gotten themselves lost briefly before finally figuring out just where the hell he was. He sighed as the three flustered ninja approached him.

"The patient is ready to be transp…by the way, what took you so long? She could've died, you know, in the time that it took…" Kaito droned in an impatient voice.

The chuunin, formerly occupying a comfortable administrative post in the Hokage's office, was not used to taking crap from anyone. "I'm sorry…sir…we aren't familiar with this territory yet."

"Seeing that you are in the BIRG, I would recommend becoming very familiar with Fire Country's geography."

The chuunin nearly snarled (the accompanying genin smiled to themselves. It was good to see their glorious leader put in his place occasionally). He managed to calm himself, smiled plastically, and glanced at the prostate figure. He was a bit startled at the uniform she was wearing.

"She's a Sound-nin?"

"Yes. She was in very poor condition when I began work, and is still fragile. Please exercise caution."

"Got it…sir." The chuunin opened a small scroll and nodded. He then performed a secession of hand seals and smashed his palm against the ground.

"Summoning Technique: Stretcher Summoning!"

A prisoner-constraining type stretcher appeared in a puff of smoke. Kaito blinked.

"You…summon your stretcher?"

The chuunin nodded with an air of self-importance. "Beats carrying it around everywhere."

"Certainly. I've just never encountered that before."

The chuunin gave a worldly smile. "One up," he thought smugly. He then turned to his subordinates, "Alright boys, load her up!"

Kaito wiped the sweat from his silver hair (a trademark of the Hayate clan), before stopping the chuunin. "You might need this," he said, handing him a syringe. "It will sedate the prisoner immediately should she come back to consciousness."

"Oh yeah, thanks. But she can't move can she? I mean…"

"You may need it for…other reasons," Kaito said with a smile.

The two genin fastened the girl to the stretcher with chakra-enhanced straps that only the strongest of opponents could break. This was really a formality more than anything, as the Sound-nin was currently in no position to break out of anything.

It was fortunate that she was still unconscious, as well, or else she would have been currently describing their respective sexual perversions in lurid detail.

-----

Tayuya had very odd dreams sometimes. It's possible, she thought during one of her rare moods of introspection, that everyone has this type of dream. They have their own logic, their own _ethos_, their own…everything. They are almost completely indefinable in terms that humans could rationally understand.

These dreams created emotions that normally she never felt or even could feel. It was a bit like entering an entirely different world, or even a different reality. She told herself that she found this experience "as annoying as all f---ing hell," but in reality, it was these dreams that kept her alive, sometimes.

They sometimes awoke feelings of hope and joy that she could never have in her waking hours. Sometimes they were sad, but with such a sadness that was purifying. And occasionally (and these were the ones she understood least) they were painful, almost as if she was being measured against a standard that she knew she could never measure up to.

But even the pain was clean, and somehow, the universe made sense.

As Tayuya was being carried by the two genins, she was in the midst of one of the most vivid dreams that she had ever had--more like a vision, really. It was like a combination of all the others she had ever had. She was lost within the unearthly vision when she heard the music of the flute, played by with far more skill than she could muster. It was almost an unreal sound; a high and fine melody at the limits of human hearing. After a short while she heard a soft, strong voice speak:

_A darkness slowly giving way _

_To light_

_A black soul inching forward_

_To redemption_

_And all that you fear_

_And worse_

_Shall come upon you_

_But you shall be cleansed._

But then the two realities clashed suddenly in an array of light and darkness, the song ended, and Tayuya woke up with a silent curse.

-----

Her mind was confused for a little while, but then the pain coming from her legs brought everything to an intense clarity. She noted that she was being moved.

"Where the f--- am I?" she yelled. She tried to move, noticed that she was bound, and let loose a barrage of obscenities that made the Konoha-nins wince.

The chuunin was more than a bit angry by the time she finished, panting with exhaustion. "You," he said with a smirk, "are a prisoner of the Hidden Village of the Leaf. We saved your worthless life, and I would recommend that you…"

"Oh yeah, yeah, you saved my life, you bunch of f---ing altruists. It was so you could torture the shit out of me! Listen, bastards, you think you're tough…"

The chuunin suddenly knew what Kaito had been talking about. He looked at the syringe, grinned, and then poked the needle into the girl's neck. She proceeded to curse him, his family, his ancestors, all those he loved, and all the generations that would proceed him, to the end of time.

And then she passed out.

Tayuya was being carried from the border of Fire Country and Rice Field Country, resulting a trip of three hours traveling at top speed. The chuunin, used to office-work, was badly winded and not at all in a good mood.

They were taking a break (the chuunin had professed concern about his subordinate's stamina, which was met with quite amusement on their behalf) when Tayuya woke up a second time with a quick curse. The redhead wasn't stupid, though. She realized that protesting would just get another quick stab from the f---ing needle. Damn! She hated needles. Kabuto, something of a germophobe himself, always made sure that the Sound-nins were vaccinated for everything. Fool needed to be f---ing vaccinated for _horseshit_, she mused bitterly. She rubbed her neck gingerly, hating needles all the more.

Suddenly, the stark realization that she had been captured struck her. She felt waves of depression crashing over her, numbing every part of her body. She knew all too well what was going to happen from here on out. She remembered a particularly brutal training session the Sound Four once had with Orochimaru and Kabuto. The purpose of the session was to resist the "interrogation" that the Sannin and his assistant inflicted upon them. Tayuya remembered that she had held out the longest (nearly going insane in the process).

After she regained consciousness, she remembered a bit of advice that Orochimaru had shared with the four. She remembered particularly well, as he hadn't spoken in his usual condescending, bemused tone; he had spoken quietly, and in dead seriousness.

"You should do all you can to end your life before being taken prisoner by Konoha. Their interrogation unit is more…proficient than most, and it is highly unlikely that you will be able to hide information. It is also highly unlikely that you will remain sane."

Of course, the worst possible thing had happened to her: she had been knocked unconscious and captured. And now she had no way of finishing herself off. Well, f—k. She sighed bitterly took a glance at her surroundings; she noticed that she wasn't moving.

The chuunin was breathing heavily and glaring at her, as if he was daring her to say something. She turned her head and looked at the two genins, who were puffing on cigarettes and chatting in low tones. One of the genins turned to the chuunin and asked "Hey, boss, we're only about twenty minutes from Konoha. Let's get a move on."

"We're moving when I say we're moving, Arata!"

"Sure, boss."

The genin shrugged and lit another cigarette. "I guess I'll check on…hey, our girl's awake again."

"She'd better keep her trap shut," the chuunin muttered.

Tayuya snarled but held her peace. No more f---ing needles for her.

To her surprise, the same genin walked over, opened a canteen and let her drink. "You smoke?" he asked.

"Uh…yeah…sometimes."

He pulled a cigarette from his pack and placed it in her mouth. "_Belairs_. They aren't the best, but they aren't too bad either." He then lit it.

"You hitting up on the prisoner, Arata?" his companion asked.

He smirked and Tayuya almost choked. "Jealous, huh?" he said with a grin.

It was all Tayuya could do to keep from cursing the guy out. After all, he did give her a cigarette (she didn't think it was poisoned or anything).

She couldn't figure out for the life of her why the hell he had done that. She breathed in the smoke (no, these sucked) and waited to be carried into Konoha.


End file.
